Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Friendly skies??

I have to admit that I was a tad bit rattled over the thought of flying to North Carolina so before I left, I signed a will and testament. It went something like, "To whom it may concern, I leave all my worldly possessions to..yada yada and then of course, I had personal messages to everyone, including my three dogs. I figured that if I met my untimely demise, someone would read my "will" and know just how prepared I was.

The first part of the flight was the deal maker or breaker. I got a window seat so I was all set to jump out if necessary. My seat mates were a bit strange. The Silent One (the lady sitting next to me) didn't speak at all...even though she sat next to a friendly Texan who introduced hisself immediately. At one point she leaned forward and I just knew she was going to toss her cookies on my shoes but no, I think she was praying.

The plane was up in the air in no time and as I looked for soft landings just in case....I saw crop circles. The moment I saw those two circles next to one another with nothing else in sight, I said, "I declare, there's some aliens around these parts!"

The next stretch was when I just knew I was getting ready to meet my Maker. It was dark by the time I boarded the plane in Houston but I still decided to keep the window open, just in case. All of a sudden, I heard a loud pop and then saw what looked like smoke coming from the wing thingies (those round exhaust pipe looking things). I was praying, "Lord Jesus, I'm going to die right here and now so just let me get to my cellphone so I can call my Boo and my girls and tell them how much I love them..." Then, I looked around, smelled the air...looked around again...no one else was panicking but me. Finally, the "smoke" cleared and I realized that it was clouds that we were flying through. Glad I didn't go running down the aisles yelling for everyone to get ready to find the parachutes.

The plane landed without any mishaps. I envisioned the wheels falling off or the plane going off the landing strip and into the black hole but that didn't happen. I walked to the door where the pilot sat in the cockpit and I yelled to him, "Thank you Mr. Pilot, you did good!" I'm sure he thought I was a nutcase but if I didn't have other people lined up behind me, I probably would've kissed the ground, sang a few choruses of "How Great Thou Art" and then danced.

To let you know that the fruit doesn't fall far from the tree, my twin sis told me the same story of her plane's fuselage glowing orange and smoking. She also thought that this was "it".

By the way, I was too busy checking out the people around me for suspicious behaviors that I didn't do the scavenger hunt on any of the flights. I'll save that for the next trip.

18 comments:

Sherry said...

Oh Simone, you make me laugh..I do love how you tell a story girl!! As for telling Mr. Pilot he did good...I'll bet he was thrilled to hear you say that!! They are somewhat "isolated" and "anonymous" other than their little message and the reality is, the pilot is responsible for getting that bird through the air and back on the ground...safely. I'll bet you made his day!!

Veronica Lee said...

You are too funny, Simone!! You're always amusing me with your lovely stories.

Heart2Heart said...

You know you are so like me that it is nearly impossible anymore to get me on an airplane. I would be thinking those very same things as you were. I guess we shouldn't fly together. We would drive people crazy around us.

Love and Hugs ~ Kat

Elle Bee said...

Hahhahaa, I'm glad there was no smoking wings, only clouds!!
Thanks for the laugh. :o)
elle

45+ and Aspiring said...

The relief about not calling for the parachutes gave me a laugh! :)

I left a note under my pillow once before a flight saying who should get my dog .. . even doing it left a lump in my throat.

My momma tells me to tell the pilot to remember that he is carrying precious cargo. I never see the pilot before the flight but as I've departement my last 3 flights I've said, "My momma says to thank you for delivering her precious cargo safely!"

Ina in Alaska said...

You may be too young to remember the writings of Erma Bombeck but that is exactly what this post reminded me of. She would write so amusingly about everyday experiences. I felt like I was on your flights. I fly a lot and fly long distances and it never ever fails, I always look at my seat neighbor and think to myself how this would be my last best friend if the plane had any kind of emergency.

I was once on a small commuter plane with many family members and we were on our way to a funeral. There were at least 12 of us on this one plane and it was struck by lightning. The plane went quiet and the lights went off. Time seemed to stand still. The captain made an announcement, This is a Reminder This is a No Smoking Flight". He was a good captain because he got the plane down on the ground. Our son Craig kissed the ground and daughter Amy probably needed a trip to the ER because I was sitting next to her and in my panic I scratched her arms up pretty bad........

Anita said...

Simone, Simone...life is never dull for you, is it? :)

I can picture you on the plane in your state of unrest. Will you be flying again anytime soon?

Thanks for the laugh!

Buckeroomama said...

Oh, Simone --you crack me up. You do! So glad you're back. :)

I remember being a couple of flights to Manila (Philippines) and when the plane landed, everybody would clap their hands. I think it's a nice gesture for the pilot. :)

Joanna Jenkins said...

I am laughing out loud! When you got to the part about thanking the pilot.... "I probably would've kissed the ground, sang a few choruses of "How Great Thou Art" and then danced." I started at the beginning and read your post to my husband.
Sooooo glad you made it safely.
xo

Formerly known as Frau said...

Sorry about the scare but I can just see your face. I fly out today and get a bit freaked out. Too funny your twin had the same it's a twin thing!

Julie D said...

I'm not a good flyer either. I'm here getting caught up on blog reading, finally! Happy Thursday!

Nezzy (Cow Patty Surprise) said...

I hear ya! We took a flight out of Springfield to Dallas one time in a little prop jet puddle jumper that the pilot had a flashlight out reading the flying manual. I knew this was it and I'd never lay eyes on my babies again. The drunk in the back of the plane sobered up and did kiss the ground when we landed.

So happy your safe, sound and on the ground. Have a wonderful day!!!

The Peach Tart said...

I love to fly. Glad you made it there and back safe because I hear a rumor that there's a wedding coming up.

Kwana said...

You are too funny but I totally know how you feel. I'm nervous with every flight. I don't like it at all.

jmt said...

So, you don't like to fly? ;)

Mandy said...

I'm trying not to laugh b/c I know you were really scared. But the image of you running down the aisle in a panic is pure hilarity! :-) I'm so glad you made it there safely.

Liz Mays said...

I'm just glad that the flight was uneventful and that you arrived safely. Welcome home!

Menopausal New Mom said...

Oh Boy, can I relate to your story. As a white-knuckle flyer myself, I never enjoy flights, I just sit there staring straight ahead waiting for something terrible to happen to the plane. Glad I'm not the only one!

Deb

 

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