Grandpa said S%$#T!!

My grandpa turned 100 yesterday. He lives in Oklahoma and it's been years since I've seen him. It's not that I haven't thought about Grandpa but traveling to that area hasn't been on a to do list at this point. I decided to give him a call - at the nursing home where he lives. According to my dad (his son) Grandpa is pretty sharp, loves sports but can be hard to understand. Not a problem, I was willing to turn up the phone volume if necessary.

Thing is, he doesn't answer his phone so I called the nurse's front desk and she forewarned him that I'd be calling, so he answered the phone.

Grandpa: Hellooo??
Me: Grandpa, it's me, Chanice.
CLICK

Grandpa hung up on me!

I waited two minutes and called back.

Grandpa: Hello?

Me: Hi Grandpa!

Grandpa: Sh--t!

Me: Uhh, Grandpa (stuttering cause he said the S word quite clearly.)

Grandpa: (interrupting) I don't know you!

Me: Yes you do Grandpa! I'm one of the twins.

Grandpa: I don't know you. Lookee here. I'm getting ready to eat dinner. Call back later.

Click. He hung up on me again. I was determined to wish him a happy birthday, even if he hung up on me twenty more times.

I called my dad and told him, "Grandpa said the "S" word." My dad was shocked. I guess Grandpa doesn't usually curse. Leave it to me, his granddaughter to turn him into a cursing man!

My dad encouraged me to call again...that he would forewarn him that I'd be calling.

I waited a bit giving Grandpa time to chew and digest his food and called him again.

Grandpa: Helloo??

Me: Hi Grandpa! Happy Birthday. How are you? This is Chanice."

All of this is coming out fast so that he won't hang up on me without at least hearing me wish him a happy birthday.

Grandpa: I know who you are!!
(I wish he would've said that two phone calls ago.)

Me: Happy birthday, Grandpa!

Grandpa: I'm 100 years old. On the 18th.

Me: Wow that's old, I mean, wow!

Grandpa: I know how old I am!

Me: Did you have cake?

Grandpa: mumbrlblymb

Me: Oh. That's good. (No idea what he said but that was the first response out of my mouth.)

Grandpa: Lookee here. The phone keep ringing. First you call, then your daddy and then you call again. I'm trying to watch sports so maybe if you don't call, I can watch.

Me: Okay Grandpa. Enjoy your sports. Happy birthday!

Grandpa: Thank you.
Click!

For some reason, that phone call tickled me. I laughed not because Grandpa cursed but because I remembered when I was little, Grandpa would always send me and my twin sister a dime taped to a piece of note paper for our birthdays. Every year, he never missed until we were maybe 12 years old. When we'd go to Oklahoma to visit him, he'd hold our hands and take us out with him to feed the chickens and his pig, Gus. He would quietly laugh as we tromped through the mud, coming back with eggs in our hands. There was something about being out in the country. My sister and I would sit in the dirt and play with caterpillars, catch fireflies and chase the chickens. It was like being in another world when we were visiting Grandpa.

I just hope that Grandpa enjoys his time left here on earth. He's quite a character and you know, I now realize that the fruit don't fall far from the tree.

Soon to be 46 year old...seeking employment

There ya have it! The official word was, "I'm so very sorry, but we've decided that it was in the best interest (whose????) to downsize certain postions and yours was chosen (Yay for me!!!)

I didn't want to give him the benefit of seeing me shed tears but a few leaked out before I was out the door. I am the type of person that either loves my job or hates my job. I loved my job and the people I worked with. We were a family. My boss was THE greatest boss I've ever worked for.

I've got quite a few skills...but it all depends on whether there's a demand for those skills (no, humming old commercials won't qualify as a job skill).

Thanks for everyone's good wishes, prayers, concern, encouragement. It meant more to me than you'll ever know. I will hold my head up because I have friends like you all!

If any of you are in the Southern California area and have word on any job leads...please let me know!

PS -- You can expect me to still blog because something has to give with the creativity surges.

Things I Learned Thursday

1) I'm an aunt again - I have 14 of the cutest nieces and nephews…yes, I said 14. If you want to see them all, click here. Momo loves you all - kisses!

2) I'm a Grammy again. TV Boo and Boyfriend Boo have welcomed an adorable "no name yet" kitty into the family. She's is freakin' adorable!!

3) If you want to see live fireworks in your kitchen, baste your ham with 120 proof rum. Stick it in the oven and stand clear.

4) I am so loving this Korean Gospel choir. They've got some soul going on, that's for sure!

5) Cockroaches know how to play dead really well. With all the big cockroaches here in the desert, I'm considering going into business and breeding purebred AKC cockroaches (with papers). Let me know if you're interested in one. I'll give you a deal! ;)

6) I feel like every time I come into work, I'm on the reality show, The Apprentice. I just hope the Donald doesn't tell me, "You're fired" tomorrow.

7) I love watching people squirm, especially the ones that don't want to ride in the same elevator with me because they are afraid that the Black cooties will rub off on them. I make sure I say things like, "What a gorgeous ring! Love your hair." Funny to see the expressions on their faces when I acknowledge them.

8) There is a such thing as "weed" perfume. Why would anyone want to smell like they've been puffing???

9) Friends are family that are born from our hearts.

10) When I am stressed, I love making a mess. Seriously. The messier the better.

Featured Blogger - Interview

Angel so graciously interviewed me and I didn't have to pay her a single cent or bribe! :)

Please go and check out the interview and tell her that I sent you.

You can find Angel here:

Licking a 9 volt battery

That's the only description I can give at the moment for what it feels like here at the job. The CEO has determined that the walking or staying paper....whichever one I get, will be given on Friday. I don't think my stomach or my heart or brain can take much more of this!

I couldn't help it..my eyes started to water and then I got angry. I don't normally get angry so for me to get angry means that when I blow up, I let it all out. Trust me, it took me going outside in 115 degree heat just to cool off.

I would never, ever put my staff through such emotional upheaval. It's just not in me to cause more pain than I have to.

So, I'm going to go find a 9 volt battery, and stick my tongue on it as a reminder that pain doesn't last always. Before long, it will all be just a memory.

Still waiting...in the meantime...

I'm playing a game of tag. Tooj has tagged me with a list of 8's. I decided to play along as I wait in suspense on when a decision has been made on my job status. Here goes...

8 Things I'm Looking Forward To:

1. A decision on whether I have a job or not
2. My birthday - July 24th
3. Getting blinds up on all of the windows at my house
4. my (and my twin sister's) children's book being published
5. Baby Boo being potty trained
6. Being back in Boo's arms when I come home from work
7. Our wedding day AND having a new last name
8. Seeing my parents in North Carolina

8 Things I Did Yesterday:

1. squealed with laughter when Boo stepped on a cockroach and it was revived 4 times.
2. checked underneath the bed 10 times when the presumed dead cockroach ran under it.
3. cooked dinner and relaxed with a glass of wine
4. planned the writers blog for our children's book
5. talked on the phone to a good friend from the old neighborhood
6. fed the kitties at the job
7. reminisced with my sister over our childhood antics
8. cried

8 Things I Wish I Could Do:

1. write fulltime
2. Learn to speak a foreign language and become a translator
3. Make enough money to not stress out so much
4. visit the kids at the elementary school I used to work at
5. adopt a child from another country
6. spend time with my dad, talking to him about his life and childhood
7. Eat Ben and Jerry's ice cream and not gain an ounce
8. Help people that could use the help

8 Shows I enjoy:
1. Grey's Anatomy
2. Project Runway
3. Wife Swap
4. Yo Gabba Gabba and Wonderpets and Little Bill
5. I Love Lucy
6. The Flinstones
7. Little Rascals
8. CSI

If you want to play a long, send me a link so I can read what you're written. Cut and paste to make it easy for you.

Moving on

I've been "told" not to discuss things dealing with my ex and his wife, any further. I was also told not to have any communication with him and he with me. This being told by an unnamed party but one that you can read between the lines.

I have a problem with this. This is my blog and I refuse to allow someone to dictate what I should say and not say on my blog. I have never written any untruths but maybe the truth is a hurtful thing? I've also not purposely mentioned names for that very reason, to provide privacy for those people who wish to remain nameless.

So, here on out, I will not talk about the ex having an affair with the person that he is now married to. I will not write about the fact that she is attempting to dictate her wishes yet, isn't woman enough to speak English to me to express her views. I will not talk about how she claims that I'm causing problems in their marriage by blogging, when the problems existed the moment they hooked up. I will not talk about the fact that she is my oldest daughter's age and yet feels that she has the power to manipulate her wishes in a house that her name is not on. I will not block her from my blog because if she doesn't like what she's reading, she doesn't have to read it.

I will talk about my daughters who I'm so very proud of! I will talk about how it took both my ex and I to raise such wonderful, intelligent, beautiful daughters. I will talk about the memories of them growing up and in that case, if he was a part of that memory, I will not mention or give him credit for that memory, in order to abide by the unnamed person's wishes - even though he is deserving of that credit.

I intend to be there when our first grandchild is born and when our youngest gets married. If she doesn't like that, I will no longer give a moment's thought.

I will from this day on forgive her for her stupidity and distrust while inwardly, not outwardly, expressing that I'm glad that she now knows what it feels like to be on the receiving end of things. I will not waste a moment of time feeling sorry for her but will let her know that if my daughters are ever pushed out of their dad's life because of her manipulation and insecurities, I'm stepping in.

With that said, I now resume this regularly scheduled blog.