It's all a matter of perspective…that is the thought ringing in my head today. I struggle to fight against things going on in my life. The sad fact is that what I'm fighting against is more than likely what was meant in my life all along. In almost two years of our marriage, I have held on to a longing to make things "the way they used to be". It's taken me this long to realize that "the way things used to be" is basically the past. And truly I'm not for  living in the past but in the present. For one, I was much younger, a little less bold, fearful and seeking out perfection most of the time. Now, I'm willing to try new things, i.e, adventures, food and a neverending thirst to be myself. I have learned to look at my ongoing medical saga as a way to breathe through the pain and keep on pushing and if pushing doesn't work, sit and chill for a bit. I no longer think that I'm going to die. The way I see it, is if it was my time to go, then w...

On May 1st, 2013, I walked my baby girl down the path to where her soon to be husband waited for her. I held her hand as we walked. I was reminded that one day, while walking into the grocery store, I told her, "One of these days, you're going to get tired of holding my hand". She replied, "I'll always hold your hand!" So, on that day, we held hands as they began their lives together as husband and wife. My eyes filled with tears quite a few times on that day. I remembered that on June 7th, my life was changed when I gave birth to a precious baby girl, Jarani who stole this mama's heart. I loved being a mom from the very beginning when my oldest, Ev'Yan was born. With two, you get even more adventures and adventures are putting it lightly. Jarebear, I want you to know that on today, that you are a special gift to me. Even though it was 24 years ago, it still feels like yesterday. I'm proud of every moment of your life...the good, th...

You KNOW it’s “one of those days” when you start it out by having M&Ms for breakfast. (Although, it could just be a good excuse for eating something I shouldn’t be.) The truth is, it’s been more than “one of those days” – more like, “one of those weeks or months”. I keep functioning by laughing. In fact, I am beginning to think that I have Laughing Tourette’s because I find throughout the day that I’m laughing to myself. The other day, I rolled over my toe while sitting in my office chair. Even though I thought it was broken, I laughed. It would be just one more story to tell in this endless chain of events. I work next door to a homeless shelter. My view outside my window usually consists of people that are homeless pacing the parking lot throughout the day. A few minutes ago, I heard the loudest, heart wrenching crying coming from outside. A man passed by my window, sobbing. He continued walking, crying and 10 steps later; he was smiling, like his crying never happened. I thought...