Sunday, February 20, 2011

Struggling

Okay, my blog is supposed to be the place where I can be honest with myself as well as my blog followers so I've got a confession...I'm struggling. Emotionally, I can be happy and all smiles one minute and the next, I'm fighting back tears. So much hasn't been said here on the blog and I still can't go into some of the things that circle around my head due to how it will affect my day to day situation.

The last few days have been days of tears and anger and frustration. I'm human so shouting to God, "Why me?" seems to cross my mind more often than it should.

Since I was knee high to a grasshopper, I was taught that to hate is a very strong emotion so I very often choose not to use it but I've been hating a lot lately. Thankfully, God is able to remind me that more powerful than hate is love and He is the perfect example of that.

Worry has also been up close and personal for me lately. I find that I worry over little things and big things to a point that my focus is gone and my creativity has been zapped....perfect reason for lacking in blog posts.

In spite of all these emotions, I know that I'm not alone. I know some of you are going through tough times or have been through tough times. I would love some encouragement so if you'd like to email me an example of where you were and where you are...I know it would be a huge help for me. Or, you can post it right here.

Thanks, my friends!

19 comments:

Mari said...

I'm sorry Simone. I don't have any great words of wisdom, but I will be praying for you.

Brian Miller said...

sorry you have been going through this...been there....suggest looking at the source of the emotion...what is causing you to feel hate...is it feeling left out, forgotten, not worthy, jealousy...know you are not forgotten, you are important and there is a plan...

Stacy Lynn said...

I could easily get bogged down in worry right now. We just took on a huge financial burden. In fact, normally I would be wallowing in fear, worry, and self-pity. What has helped me is an amazing little devotional a friend of mine introduced me to. It's called "Jesus Calling, Enjoying Peace in His Presence" by Sarah Young. You can find it at Walmart of all places. Take today's devotion, for example....

"Trust and thankfulness will get you safely through this day. Trust protects you from worrying and obsessing. Thankfulness keeps you from criticizing and complaining: those "sister sins" that so easily entangle you. Keeping your eyes on Me is the same thing as trusting Me. It is a free choice that you must make thousands of times daily. The more you choose to trust Me, the easier it becomes."

There's more, but that is the core of it. I'm learning to shift my focus and I can't tell you how much better I feel. I find that lately I am filled with such joy.

Adding my prayers to those of the others.

Debby@Just Breathe said...

You are not alone in your struggle. I like what Stacy Lynn wrote. Our minds can really makes twists and turns of things going on in our lives. I will keep you in my prayers. God is good and he knows your heart.

Nama Halacy's Comfy Cottage said...

I am your newest follower and I am so sorry you are struggling! Sometimes you can't help but feel hate, but really it hurts you more than it hurts whoever you hate. Kind of makes you hate them even more! Keep your chin up, your blog is beautiful!

Mining for Diamonds said...

I'm a new follower too, and I just wanted to offer hugs and prayers to you. I know it really stinks to be going through such a difficult time in emotions.

Might I gently suggest that you visit your doctor, to rule out any physical issues that might be contributing to the way you are feeling? Sometimes when our bodies are out of whack, our emotions can get out whack as well. I had some issues last year where I thought I was clinically depressed but it turned out my blood count was so low that I needed medical intervention. After two units of blood I was a new person!

I know that for me, counseling has also been such a great blessing. Being able to talk to a professional and process those Big Feelings and LET THEM OUT in a safe environment really went a long way in healing for me.

As much as I know we would desire for the Word of God and prayer to be "enough", I do feel that God gives us resources to help treat mind, body, AND spirit. Praying for you for wisdom!

Kathy said...

I agree with the suggestion of the lady ahead of me. I was/am struggling as well, and talked to my doctor about all my issues. Sometimes we may need help coping just to see our way through. I ask God everyday to help me but sometimes we also need earthly help. Don't be afraid to ask for it.

If you would like to send me an email, I'd be glad to talk to you more.

Deborah Ann said...

I've been wandering in the desert for a while now...and I'm getting so much help from a list of declarations that someone emailed to me. I posted them here:

www.markingsinthewood.blogspot.com

and start speaking God's promises! Things WILL change...

Nezzy said...

This is so funny, I've been goin' though something just heartwrenching lately and I posted today about my feelings. I can't post the problem...wouldn't be prudent.

My prayers are with you my dear sister. The weight of the world can be a heavy thing to bare.

God bless you and have a beautiful day my friend!

Linda Myers said...

For me, talking about it helps the most, even though I tend to isolate when times are tough.

Jill said...

Simone,

So sorry to hear of your troubles. I will keep you in my prayers. I've faced quite a few obstacles in my life, and like you do not like the hate word. When things get hard, I focus on the good and I am blessed to wake up each and every day. For many reasons...for I know my life could be worse. This week was hard here and put things into perspective yet again. My husband lost a 20 year old friend, the funeral was Weds. The parents had just lost his twin brother 1 year ago. Then on Thursday we almost lost my husband's brother.
We only get one chance in this life... we are in control of only ourselves, and sometimes how we react to situations can make all the difference. As the saying goes.."this too shall pass..." I don't know what is troubling your heart, but I do know better days are ahead. Sometimes when my heart is troubled I find reaching out even more to those in need in the community helps me realize my blessings and my strengths. If you'd like to talk more my email is jill58972@gmail.com. Hard to put it all in a comment.
Hang in there sweetie, better times are coming your way! :-)

Blessings,
Jill

Littlespoon said...

I was just passing through.

What you're feeling is normal - we all have our low points.

If something in particular has made you feel this way, no matter how desperate or grim the situation looks - it will pass. It always does.

Please try to remember that, even when you're feeling low, you are surrounded by people who love you and care about you.

If coping with day-to-day life does become difficult, there is no shame in asking for help, whether you need comfort from your family, a listening ear from a friend or advice from a doctor.

Each of these things has helped me whenever I feel low.

I hope you begin to feel like your old self soon.

Ls xxx

MissKris said...

Honey, my offer still holds if it eases your worry. You know what I'm talking about. Looking forward to seeing you one last time on Saturday.

Anita said...

You've mentioned your struggle with depression before. Does your twin sister share that challenge? If so, how does she handle it?

I am a strong believer in getting counseled; be it by a psychiatrist, psychologist, or someone trained to counsel.

I'm praying for you, too.
xoxo

Buckeroomama said...

I'm sorry for what you're going through. Whenever things go wrong, I try to remind myself that "this, too, shall pass" and it does, in time. Have faith, Simone. {{hugs}}

mrstdj said...

Hugs to you sis! Sorry that you are going through at this moment! I hope that their are brighter moments in the near future.

Lin said...

You have been through a lot of major changes, pally, and you have every right to be sad sometimes. And while I don't have any brilliant answers for you, I think you have to give yourself some time to adjust. There are many losses to grieve and that will take time. Just be sure to connect with those you love when you are down so that it doesn't overwhelm you.

Hugs, my friend. I send love, prayers, and peace for you. Be proud of the strong woman you are! We love and admire you at the Duck and Wheel!

Life with Kaishon said...

I am praying for you right this second sweet Simone. Some stages we go through in our lives are so difficult, aren't they?

ethelmaepotter! said...

I'm just catching up on some of my blog reading, and as you are one of my favorites, I found myself reading every post you'd written since my last visit. Since I'm reading them from newest to oldest, I already know some of what is causing your heartache.

Last year about this time, I went through a period of extreme depression and wrote about it - but not all of it, because someone who was a big part of that depression reads my blog. And even though, through therapy and changes in meds, I've drastically improved, there are still weeks when I just want to pull the covers up over my head and not face the world.

I'm e-mailing you, sweetie.

 

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