Only I --- could cut my tongue eating a graham cracker.
Only I --- could be the designated pillow for the kitty.
Only I --- could cry from hearing O Come All Ye Faithful.
Only I --- could eat seaweed for breakfast and convince myself that it is the yummiest snack there is. (Even better than Reeses Puffs Cereal)
Only I --- could develop an allergy to fish after 49 years.
Only I --- could have the joy of teaching a classroom of preschool kids in church and hearing them pray.
Only I --- could have an epic fail day in the kitchen while making caramel apples. Note to self --lose the recipe for reverse caramel apples.
Only I --- would get the same guy twice on the phone wanting to commit suicide - AGAIN. This time, though, he was threatening to take out a few people with him. Scary but true.
Only I --- could misunderstand someone that is telling me that they are "packing". She said, "I'm still living here but I'm packing." My response? "Wow, the neighborhood must be pretty bad for you to be packing (as in carrying a gun)." I think she got off the phone totally confused after talking to me. It was 10 seconds later that I realized that she was "packing to move" to a new location.
Only I --- could say, "Hey Baby" while talking on the cellphone to my daughter and passing a homeless guy at the same time. He said, "Heyyyyyy!!!"
Only I --- could have as much food as a convenience store in my desk. Three kinds of tea, two boxes of Fiber One bars, graham crackers, Lipton's cup of soup, Reeses Puff Cereal, potato chips, seaweed snacks, cheezits and pumpkin seeds. (Hey, I have to have a choice when I'm following my cravings, right?)
Only I --- could take on something thinking I would bless others but I have been amazingly blessed instead.