This is a blog post that almost wasn't. You know the one where you think, "No one will relate to this"? But, then I realized that by keeping this to myself, I may be preventing someone from reading what may need to be shared. When I was a kid, I loved reading Mrs. Piggle Wiggle books by Betty Macdonald. She had cures for just about everything. For the kids that whined or hated getting up for school or hated cleaning their ears, she always seemed to have the right substance to change their outlook. In one story, Patsy Brown refuses to take baths so Mrs. Piggle Wiggle tells her parents to let the dirt accumulate and when it does, to plant radish seeds on Patsy's skin. Before long, Patsy has radish plants growing all over her. (I know, weird concept.) If I were a character in Mrs. Piggle Wiggle's life, I would be the one with "Don't Care-itis". It's the "itis" where after every thought, it's followed with an "I don't car...

8 Seconds., My life ended with a period and then, began again, with a comma. 8 seconds has left a huge impact on me. In 8 seconds, I died. My heart stopped. Every function ceased. If my life was a sentence, there wasn’t a comma but a period at the end. My life has always been filled with the unexpected. I wouldn’t know how to live it any other way. I was admitted into the hospital on 1/27/12 due to chest pains for over 2 weeks. The pain and other symptoms brought me there with the hopes of a diagnosis. In an effort to get rid of the chest pains, I was given morphine in my IV while the medical technician was performing an EKG. I heard the technician ask me to put my arm down as it was propped up on a pillow. I looked at my arm but had no control over it. That was all I can remember before I was gone. The heart has 3 “internal” pacemakers. When one ceases to function, another kicks in and when that one ceases, the third one acts as a backup. It is uncommon for all three “...

Thanks for such great questions! Rae  asked: Have you had any eye openers in your relationship with J?   Yes, but nothing I wasn't already prepared for. No matter what color J's skin is, he and I couldn't be more of a matching pair.  Sure, there are some differences between us that can be considered cultural but the majority of differences have nothing to do with culture. The other night, we were lying in bed and I said to J, "Babe, did you know I'm black?" He totally gasped and said, "Now you tell me! I had no idea because I'm colored blind. I thought you were green!" There will always be barriers in place being in an interracial marriage but love comes in all colors and racial ignorance isn't worth stressing over. I'm praying that your grandkids will grow up loved and proud of who they are, not dealing with stupidity in the form of racism. Adam   asked: What was your worst experience in school?   Unfortunately, the first thing ...

Brian Miller asked...What is one experience that changed the direction of your life? I grew up dreaming of a happy ever after life. When I married my first husband and we had our daughters, I thought, "This is it." I just assumed that the stage and direction was set for my lifetime. Then, the "one experience" aka divorce happened. The divorce literally changed my life. My dreams, goals, wishes, location, passion and trust were altered tremendously. I have more of a purpose than I ever realized. I love who I am now. Here in Oregon, I have found "home". (And of course, J, the love of my heart.) Mari asked...This isn't a very deep question but I'm wondering how J and your family are doing throughout this health scare. J has been exceptional in taking care of me. I never anticipated the outpouring of love and concern that has been showered on me. My daughters, sisters, parents, and friends have bee worried about me and continue to check on me by phon...

I'm in recuperating status. In other words, I'm taking it slow and as easy as I possibly can. It is hard for me, as ornery as I am but this was also a wake up call for me. I mean, how many people experience life and death, face to face? One thing I've realized is that the creativity still exists inside of me. In fact, it's been poured out, spilled over even more. I'm not ready to write the next great novel (yet) but what I am thinking is that there is something in store for me and I'd just better put on my big girl panties and brace myself for it. Have you ever wanted to ask someone a question or find out something but didn't know how to ask? Lately, what has been echoing in my head is this: Everyone has a story to tell....everyone. It just means asking a question which leads to an answer or even a small story. I've decided that I'm going to use the time that I'm laying low to listen to your stories. I may visit you or email you or just generally...

I can't understand how or why things happen the way they do. But what I do know now is no matter what happens, life goes on. I was discharged from the hospital yesterday and not wanting to sound overly dramatic, still recovering from the trauma. I went in with chest pains and during the course of those chest pains, my heart stopped. 8 seconds where my heart flat-lined and I was "gone". When I was brought back, I looked for J. I needed to know he was close by. I needed his calm assurance that it was going to be okay. Next, I tried to process what happened while I was gone. I know for sure that while I was struggling, life was going on for everyone around me. All across the blogging world, in countries everywhere, life was going on. The world wasn't changed by what I was experiencing but I decided that I was going to change things as a result of what I experienced. I can't describe, what I felt. There are no words yet. I'm not even sure I'm quite up to makin...

When I am still, there is usually something wrong with me. I'm NEVER still. Even when I'm asleep, my mind isn't still. It races. Here's a peek at some of the thoughts floating around in my head at night: Why does my chest hurt? What is wrong with me? Am I dying? I wonder if the guy that lived here before us, died here? What the heck was he thinking? I wonder if the cellphone bill was paid for this month? What is Mooshu dreaming about? Am I going bald? What is so hard about cleaning up after yourself? How big is the rat that's climbing around in the attic? Will he chew his way through to our bedroom? Hostess is going bankrupt? As you can see, most of those thoughts are randomly dumb and they are enough to exhaust me! The last two weeks have been a wake up call for me to be still. I haven't found out the source of my heart pains and other symptoms. The less I know, the more worried I am. I need answers but I also need to be still. I have lost count of how many peo...